Wishing upon a broken star

Before, before teaching myself to forget your voice, I wanted to believe in its power again, like I used to; but I have seen how hollow promises can be, how cruel mere sounds can be.

I want to ask you, who you are to me with all the sincerity in the world. I want to listen to you and trust you as though you and I are still in love and unbreakable. As though trust is the most precious pearl and you are the strongest oyster in the world and you are carrying it for me and you have gifted it to me. I want to hear from you, Girl you are the most valuable gift that I ever had.

You know, when I wake up each morning I think of you, but I am still strong and I am standing in front of you with that adamant faith that I’m doing everything right. I once believed, I’m unbreakable only because you are protecting me, but no dear, you have never held me close... You had your own inhibitions and in all those slips you made me stand alone. You have taught me that I don’t need you in my life to sustain.

I always had dreams about us. We will go and sit in the beach after work, watching the great evening sea... I will run to the waves and back... My feet will sink deep into the sand as the water speeds past me and back, you will come near me holding me tight as if no tide can touch your girl when you are around... You will pull me further and further into you- with your touch, you will give me that stolen kiss in the beach, you will love me as if you don’t need the strength of those four walls around to love you girl... You will dive deep inside me. We will melt together in so many ways that I forget to concentrate on the world around...

You will put your arms around my shoulders and I feel I am yours. I’m standing on the top of that golden castle which has only a door that only opens to your whistle.  My heart will write fairy tales in the air in which you are the prince and I am the princess...

We will make this world of ours beautiful. And looking into your eyes I will say with the innocence of a three year old girl- “I love you.” Then, you- my reflection- would smile at me with all the same sincerity and will give me the world’s warmest hug ever. You will hold my shoulders tightly and will take my chin up with your right hand. You will wipe my tear with your hand saying, never cry again for me my dear...That’s when I’d realize that you have loved me, and always will...

But fairy tales are never true; they will always remain as dreams of that small girl who wishes upon a broken star that once a handsome prince will come riding a unicorn to give her a kiss and she will become the princess of his province.