dedication.......

tensions mounting behind secrets untold
a friendship stretched and ripping at the shore.
the affection we hold for each other no one will understand
and neither will they understand that we hold each others mind.
you've always been there for me and me too...
and now that we face losing each other and I'm at a plan of what to do and what not to.
and the way you treat me is causing my strength to slip
I hope this uncertainty  will be  over soon.
it hurts too much, its a dying bloom.
and this I know, your biggest fear..
i will remain here unchanged for you...
for are we not the cherished and closest of friends?

as  you smile,
I noticed the tears that softly radiate your eyes
I found out the hate you  disguise
doing so,what u gain? you suffer internally
struggling to hide behind a fake part of you
just to attain some sort of acceptance
You go your part unnoticed, just as expected

i used to say i am hard hearted..
but u used to pretend u posses a lite one....
but..now...how could we say yours is lite and mine is hard....
no ya...we are  mistaken... it might be the other way only...

silly gal...

very silly, silly gal. She never did understand...she is...
That the world doesn't care about  her. everyone has their own pains, their own joys and their own dreams. She is but another one....
such a silly gal who never knew when to stop....

.
In darkness, she saw colors but in the colors , she found her dreams. Little did she know that dreams are not always the same. though It doesn’t replace, It fills the emptiness but not the meaning....

She is different. But, now she is not any more important....not at all...she can get lost... none do care....

The stories are the very same. Silly girl; she is special..but  full of Nothing.

A NOTE FROM ME.....

lord...almighty..u know I’ve been looking forward to this day since.. well, forever. But now that it’s now this time, I am saddened and desperate  beyond logic. i may say, my connection isn’t that rooted...but it is.... more and more as i am trying to pluck off... i am....used to... I’ve learned to move on. However, the pain of today is inevitable....its more than imaginations.. the only way to escape...is write write and write... until it fades away......

I’m much more excited.. quite. But I’ll miss it. The annoying ones..the moments we fought for nothing... the times we end up in tears. The funny ones. The smart ones. The silly ones. The awesome ones. The ones who’re half-normal and the others who’re fully crazy.  or at least the ones I laughed..i prayed

.

I’ll miss your ignorance. I’ll miss complaining about them, of swearing after each fight. The ones, who gave me headaches. The nice ones which gave me confidence.... And hey, even allowed myself to be a part of u at least for a season.., a “dude”, a friend, an enchanter. The one who belonged to me..

I’ll miss my cheeku for his open-mind, for his impatience in listening to every silly mandan thoughts .. hmm...

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And most of all, my encouragement ....my inspiration. my ideas were sculpted by his unseen  fingers, my thoughts by his untold words. He taught me more than anyone ever has. He has been my inspiration. , he has kept me grounded...

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The play is ending in another period. I’ve never been sadder to see a scene end.. i pray maynot be Today’s the end of all those yesterdays.

Here sometimes may end this hallway. No longer would I have to drift  through people with a list of questions through these narrow halls....may be Here ends this chapter.... a beautiful chapter...  for today, may this moment remain for eternity,not just words...i meant it... and take from me a farewill kiss.......

leaving behind me myself n mine....and i am walking away.... it kills me enough that you dont care enough to stop me....

hmm......I simply don’t understand. What did  I do?  i entered the bathroom  took a handful of water  and fiercely threw  it at my face. The drops jump and swirl, performing great salsa in thin air. i can see the curved lines on my cheeks. The flow of water to the tired eyes push out tears and water with the same strength and turned my eyes a shade of crimson. The pink turkey towel brazes against my skin. now i can clearly see that face in the mirror.my face....where i dream of a touch from him... 
Hypothetical situations- daydreams even though broken- were an inherent part of her character, especially on the days when reality played games of a best actor...

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wanna be lost in mothers lap...
just like a baby....
the wound is so deep..
can be healed only by a goddess
she will touch my hair with her wrinkled fingers..
then i can feel god touching my head...
where i can drain all my sorrows and pain...

yes she is the goddess of love....
MY AMMA.....